Riding on the immense energies of the 10/10 vibration I am taking this leap of faith to finally come out of my spiritual closet. I am no longer playing small, I step wholeheartedly into my calling, I emerge through the shadows of fear and self-doubt fully in my power; an awakened wild woman. I walk my talk and embrace everything that I am- Mother, Artist, Writer, Seeker, Healer, Psychic, Goddess, Sage of the earth, pure light of unconditional love. I am here, here I am. And so it is.
My heart is overflowing with excitement as I type these words. I have spent my whole life meandering between the calling of spirit and my own self imposed limitations. Dimming my light and placing an invisible barrier of how high I could fly around myself. Trying desperately to fit into one category or another and being too obsessed with the outcome of my endeavours- fighting against the flow- needing to control everything and having it all worked out before taking the leap.
I have been reflecting on the moments when I dimmed my light and succumbed to fear and doubt; remaining anonymous and extinguishing the fire of my calling. As I went through the filing cabinet of my life experience the common self-talk in all of those unrealised dreams was: “I’m not ready”, “I don’t know enough”, “I haven’t got the life experience”, followed closely by: I need this certificate or that bit of training. I need a better place to live, I need a workshop, a retreat, a mentor, a healing session, a past life regression……whilst the universe answered all of these requests, and I am deeply enriched by these experiences, today I woke up and just knew that all I need to do is step out of the matrix of the so called “real world” and realise that I already have everything I need, I’ve always had it. There is nothing else to do except show up and shine.
The moments when I did show up and allow myself to shine, such amazing things happened. Fully embracing the artist within for example and sharing with the world my work through exhibitions, festivals, speaking engagements and conferences has filled me with incredible joy and passion. Yet there is a niggling feeling in my womb, there is more for me to do, there is more for me to be…it is time for a massive birthing, a shift into the fullness of my calling…so here I am…pressing myself against the edges of the cave walls and pushing through the darkness once again as my healing and intuitive work is revealing itself to me.
Right now, in this very moment, I have made a decision. I am flowing like the river, abandoning the old way of being and just surrendering to the messages that are coming through, without attachment, without control. Two days ago I was drawn to re-visit one of my art journals from High School and I found one entry on spirituality I wrote: “the earth is my religion and my body is the temple of worship”. I must have been 16 years old. I knew 22 years ago where my calling was. I am ready now to live it.
The next 3 months are the final stages of my incubation and then the most incredible offerings are on their way to be shared. I will be holding space for the creative center to ignite and mirror the splendor of our inner connection with nature, with each other and transmit the most powerful force in the universe, unconditional LOVE.
I dedicate this post to my Munay Family, my sisters and brother who inspire me to shine.